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The Eastern Missouri Dodgeball Association

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WEEK 7 PLAYOFF BRACKET
CHAMPIONSHIP PREDICTIONS

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WEEK 7 CHAMPIONSHIP RESULTS (MOSTLY)

ALL CONFERENCE TEAMS

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Team and Division Breakdown

National League

NL East
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Leading the charge in the NL East, and for the entire league most likely, is the undefeated 2006 champion Zumwalt Bad Boys. This speed team, led by league MVP Corey Hertel and 1st Team All-Conference performer Steve Lowrey, these wrestlers from FZN look to repeat their success last year. Standing in their way are the 636 Boys, who claim to be the best dodge ball team in the area code. Team captain Cody "Grasshopper" Ervin refuses to be intimidated in telephone interviews as he states "you can't hit what you can't see." The Bullitts return from their 2006 campaign angry and bent on revenge. As one of the best teams that flourished late last season, with an average age of 22, Jimmy Marshall hopes to be standing with the championship cup at the end of Week 7. And that could just happen.

One of the most unexpected teams of 2006 is back as the X-Men will once again attempt to live up to their Superhero status. Backed by the strong arm Zach & Blake McGinnis, these baseball stars will once again attempt to reach the Final Four. Finally, and with no lack of respect, is the Broncos. This team, raised on the mean streets of Denver, want to charge the competition under the amazing dodging ability of "The Pickle," Herman Dillard. The division is made complete by the late addition of the Wild Dogs, lead by the fearless canine named Bill "German Shepherd" Krets. His pack from Christian High School includes his son Caleb, who has inherited Dad's bombardment abilities that made him the standout of the Class of 1977. This division is extremely tough with parts of 5 different returning teams taking part--expect at least 3 to make the championship tourney. Though everyone knows of the Bad Boys, there is no doubt plenty of challengers.

NL Central
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The city of Troy has given the state of Missouri a lot--a great high school, excellent parks--and a devastating dodgeball team named Arson that has won back to back Dodge Mania tournaments. These muscle bound Trojan football players may be the strongest teams in league history--and one of the top teams that could replace the Bad Boys as league champions. The Captain Planets (a replacement team for last years runner up the All-Americans) is rich on tradition and is sure to mount a challenge, just like the previous two years. Captains AJ "Eatin' Good" Grubbs and Coty "I'm Quick and" Hastie plan to use their team speed to leap past all others.

If a team is willing to drive 45 minutes each week for the league...do you think they're going to be good? Yeah, and so do we. And that is exactly what the Stingrays are doing with their drive from the hood in Ballwin. When asked why they would cruise all this way, "Big" Ben Johnston says "It's all about the title baby." Holt High School will be well represented this year as the Guardians go on the attack. Their team is anchored by the 32 inch vertical of Chris Glass. And finally, The Mean Machines, based off of the movie The Longest Yard, plan to take their prison experience into the dodgeball arena to overtake the Guards--and all others. Team Captain Mike "the Crutch" Crutcher boasts of their overall team speed as 3 of their members can go baseline to midline in under 1.3 seconds. There team gets a mid-season boost when All-National team member Andrew Merz returns from college to join his younger brother Peter (no kidding, he was named to the All-National team in Chicago last July).

NL West
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Leading the charge in the West is the Dream Team, the 2006 Fall champions in Elsberry. Led by "The Terminator" Chris Cooper and Jordan "Ironhead" Heyworth, these champs know nothing else but the title. Standing in their path however is quite a formidable adversary--the Raunchy Burritos.

These Mexican entrees went to the Final Four in 2006 and were runners-up to the champions in 2005. Back from his wrestling position at Ritenour HS is Kevin Haynes. His California beach upbringing and 65 hours a week in the weight room have chiseled his biceps into precision pumping pistons--and ready fire cannons for this sport. The rest of Burritos are varsity Timberland athletes, and are real good. The Dudley Boyz, winners of Dodge Mania I back in September of this year, are back for a fight--but can they remake the glory they felt almost 6 months ago? Competition is at its all time highest--and can David and brother Vinnie bring get the table?

Dodgeball is a game of war where the winner is the last man standing. The EMDA is also proud to announce...This Is Sparta. These top notch athletes led by the skills of Nick Robertson & Nic Dyarzabal bring their power game to the Athenian floor and refuse to surrender. Unless of course, they are first shot by either Jake or Jason Marco of the Hitmen. Though this team is appears passive like a family of fawns gazing by a stream, underneath the surface they are assassins bent on destroying all of those who stand in their path. Overall, this division is very even, league officials expect a 20 game winner, but the division title might actually come down to which team doesn't self-destruct down the stretch.

American League

AL East
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To start off, this is a mixed division with 3 teams competing in the girls division (Emo Kidz, Sweet Feet, & the Vicious Vixens) and the other 3 competing the middle school division (Boon Dox, Wildcats & the E-Town Rangers). Though all 6 teams are guaranteed prospective spots in the playoffs, they will also compete in the Co-Ed division and have a chance to take home double trophies if they so desire. As for the girls, the fabulous Emo Kidz return to defend their 2006 championship. Led by Bailey "Hickory Dickory" Dockery and other members of the Timberland Softball program, these fiery ladies know how to throw heat.

Not to be outdone is the 2006 runners-up,The Vicious Vixens (formerly known as the Vinyl Peaches) bring back All-Conference members Whitney Bowman and the strong arm of Hayley "Pow Pow" Powell. New to the EMDA is Sweet Feet, organized by Ashley "Crawfish" Crawford with other ladies who work with her at the shoe store. Though they spend their days assisting people with their footwear, they plan to stomp out the competition. They are proud to lay claim of being the "toughest shoe professionals this side of the Mississippi." New this year is the first time we have ever had a Middle School division, and 3 teams signed up to play.

Both the Boon Dox and the Wildcats were formed out of youth group members of FBC/LSL, and though they are brothers and sisters in Christ, they plan to be lions and not lambs on the court. Adult captain Jeff "Papercut" Easterwood brings his trash talkin' style of play along with his Wright City based team, while the only Middle School student in history to receive All-Conference honors, John "Beam Me Up" Scott, plans to continue his successful career. The favorites in the Middle School division have to be the E-Town Rangers. With their previous experience from the Fall league, and due to the fact that each member is in the 8th grade, their years of dodging wrenches while standing across Hwy 79 should pay off for them.

AL Central
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Which team is the most successful Co-Ed in the history of the EMDA? If you guessed Not to Mess With, you'd be right. Led by youth pastor Karl Messenger and Elsberry varsity player Cara Thurston (both members of the Loco Motives, runners up to the national co-ed champions), this team on paper is head and shoulders above the rest of the competition in the Co-Ed category of play. Messenger has been labeled by his enemies as "the hardest man to hit" in dodgeball, a title which he holds proudly. As successful as NTMW has been, The Cuts really don't care. The Cuts, 2006 consolation champs who finished the season undefeated over the last 4 weeks return an all-star bunch of peeps who plan to chop NTMW down to size.

The Roaring Jackalopes, with their average age of 24, don'fst plan to back down either. Their recruiting efforts have lasted over a month as they try to put together a killer team that can compete with anyone. Eric "Beefcake" Vahle brings his thunderous shoulders into the cage. Up from the Ozarks, with most of their teeth still attached, is the Hillbillies. New to the league, their hoping they can catch on quick. Alyssa "Snow" White is leading the charge for this co-ed team, and she is a fierce competitor. Finally, new to our league this season is the best from St. Peter's...Dodge This! Ken & Kayla Arndt lead the charge as they try to dodge, dip, dive, duck, and dodge. And for those teams thinking that DT will back down in the face of adversary, well...they aren't! As a whole, this division is top heavy partly because of the tremendous success NTMW has had in the past, but also because there is so much not known about the other teams.

AL West
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The West, arguably the more balanced of the two Co-Ed division, may be the only division without a clear favorite. With all the other divisions having such great talent, and to the fact that Boys Teams tend to excel when playing against Co-Ed teams, the winner of this division may sneak by with barely a .500 record (which is actually pretty good if you understand that Co-Ed records tend to be quite a bit below those of all boys teams. Nonetheless, Matt Gillardi of Vendetta claims to have the inside claim at being the best team of overthrowing Not to Mess With. As team captain of last year's Krazy 8's, his team just about upset them last year. Regardless, the "Italian Stallion" is back, and this year promises a title to his adoring fans.

Nobody can talk about the sport of dodgeball without including the name AJ "Sly" Fox. Over the summer, Fox recruited all star team members, took the name Holy Dodgers because of his great faith in Christ, took a road trip to suburban Chicago, and came home as a National Champion. In addition, the leaders of this 250 team one day tournament named him MVP of the entire deal (not kidding either, he's just that good). Yet, this year's team The Saints, collegiate members who attend school at Maryville, were not with him in the Windy City. How good are they? Time will tell. Street Signs, a rural team with some members living in Foristell, are not impressed. "Every team starts the season with the same record," can be heard through whispers, and their hoping that other teams will Yield to their incredible abilities, or take a Detour when they see them coming.

The Bearded Unicorns is a rather unique team--they could either be really good...or really not that good. It could all depend on which ones of their teammates take their roles seriously. On their roster is some unbelievable talent including Corri Ashlock, Dustin Ebeler, Andrew James Bond, and some professional drummer named O'Steen who excelled at Dodge Mania III on New Year's, but can they unify into a single thinking unit? And finally, is the Crazy Ivans. Led by local school teacher and hero Mike Underberg (the dude took a taser during a classroom simulation), this team prefers their Eastern Siberian style of play they are accustomed to as they grew up throwing frozen bass at each other in the Irkutsk peninsula. There's nothing to fear, cause Underberg is here.

Don't miss these pictures from the
Chicago Dodgeball National Championship
where FBCLSL teams took first and second place.

Enjoy these scenes from last year's activities