2007 EASTERN MISSOURI DODGEBALL ASSOCIATION
Week 1 Highlights
THE EXPECTED: As usual, the Zumwalt Bad Boys complete the week with an undefeated record. This was especially difficult since the league commissioner stacked their opening week deck by playing some extremely difficult teams. Well, Hertel, Lowrey, and the boys from Panther Country continued where the left off last year...pumped up, fired up, and with a target on their back (for those counting, the win streak is now at 19 games). Also as expected, the Dream Team from Elsberry stole the show but for those who came to Monday's practice night knew that could happen from watching their rifle arms leave other teams with nightmares. Some people doubted the abilities of the Dudley Boys. After all, many of them played for the Average Joe's last year, which to say the least...was average. But they have emerged and represented the city of O'Fallon well going 4-1 including a big win over the Broncos. The Stingrays, with their sweet looking jerseys did not intimidate anyone...they just stung them and won! These tiny whales are going to make a big impact in the EMDA, and they look great doing it.
THE SHOCKED: Arson, the Raunchy Burritos, & the Captain Planets all have 2 losses. What? Are you kidding me? No we're not. The Burritos, led by "Slim" Tim Strautemeier & Kurt "Diamond" Kutter were upended by The Cuts--a Co-ed team that had just gotten demolished by the Mean Machines in the cage. To many, it seems that there team speed is down a bit compared to where it was over the last 2 years. Arson lost a major game to the ZBB (and started a heated rivalry that will last for the 7 weeks), but then got upset by the Mitch Emge led Hitmen. Arson's Youth Pastor Zack Hufty from Troy remarked "I cannot believe what I just saw, teams running laps around the church to get warmed up for dodgeball."
Yeah, I suppose we take this league pretty seriously. One of the highlights of the night had to be when "Michael" Jordan Powell (an 8th grader from the E-Town Rangers) hit "Dangerous" Dan Jones to claim victory over many of the Timberland Varsity football players. The E-Town Rangers may only be 8th graders, but they came out and whipped everybody (by the way, the Middle School National Championship is in July in Chicago). Lastly, the Hitmen, prophesied by Jake Marco to be the best team in the league, and led by returning All-American Mitch Emge, also faced a double loss night. Though both were real close, few executions were performed last night.
THE SURPRISED: The Crazy Ivans, a team put together the last minute and with last minute worries about having 6 people show up, went 5-0 including wins over the Bullitts and Planets. "South" Dakota Hemming is just that good, and Mike "I come from the land down" Underberg adds a vicious 1-2 punch. The Mean Machines also surprised the competition with their solid balance of muscle and speed. Favored to finish 4th in the division, they lead the NL Central utilizing the speed of Jeff "Black" Beard and the muscle of Peter "the Great" Merz. Key balls were caught at crucial moments by "Nolan" Ryan Hoff and Danny "Caramel" Applebaum.
Surprised in a bad way was the Bullitts and Vendetta. Both teams have high aspirations (and both should because of their great abilities), but it seemed like little went right for them. Freddie "Krueger" Freedman will be the first Bullitt player to tell you that some tough calls went against them, while "the Italian Stallion" Matt Gillardi of Vendetta will point out that they lost 3 games in the 3rd match in one-on-one situations. Look for these two teams to rebound quickly. The Guardians also had a rough moment, but injuries are a factor--one of their top players has a broken throwing hand.
HOW GOOD ARE THEY? Real good. The boisterous 636 Boys from Timberland and This is Sparta from Holt had memorable performances by going undefeated except when they played each other. Nick "Here's to You Mister" Robertson recruited a team of muscle heads--they earned a lot of respect for a rookie team. And the loud 636 Boys with their 50 fans or so let the whole state know who they believe the best team is. Led by Cody "Grasshopper" Ervin, these jersey-cladded warriors went from zero to hero and moved up the rankings faster than any other team in the league. Representing the Middle School division with distinction is the Wildcats. With the "Mouth of the South" Jeff Easterwood as the adult helper, this team can dodge as well as any team this side of the Mississippi. They even defeated an all boys team. Yet, their rival franchise--the Boon Dox, will not lay low nor give up defeat easy. As long as John "Wayne" Scott is in the game, they will have a shot, partner. The Lupfer duo is pretty good as well.
THE A.L. CENTRAL: The only thing that got decided on Thursday was that everybody is in it and nobody will ever be out of it. Not to Mess With's All-American player Karl Messenger was on a trip to Detroit. However, they did lose a somewhat embarrassing loss to their own MS team that traveled with them. Dodge This! and the Roaring Jackalopes represented well. RJ team member David "The" Manche "Show" got out early quite a bit which led to a couple of lopsided losses, as well as Will "Smith" Hanke.
Travis "Slap" Lappe is back for year 3 (the previous hero of the Purple Cobras & Ninja Turtles) to lead the Hillbillies, while the Cuts sit atop the division. This dangerous team lead Josh "Gibson" Brandt snuck up behind and beat the Burritos, which has to be an early season surprise for them. This upset might have been as surprising Dodge This' win over the heavily favored Broncos. All the fans felt Nick Oyarzabal looked good wearing a warm sleeve.
NEWCOMERS: The Wild Dogs barked loudly in wins against the X-Men & the Unicorns, but had an accident against the Wildcats. Likewise, the X-Men, the last team to officially organize had a rough go, but neither of these teams played poorly. They both had tough opening rounds and new teams tend to improve the most. Sweet Feet played very well under the fierce arm of Reese "Slam" Bannister. Though winless, they won't be for long. The Street Signs fought hard, but went the Wrong Way. However, their heads should not be put on the Low Shoulder, they held there own against Arson pretty well, they just have to get past this Bump in the road.
OLD TIMERS: The Dillard Pickles led Broncos missed out in a big way by losing a tough match to Dodge This, but remain a strong third place in the NL East. These vets know what it takes to get the V's. Likewise, the Saints went 3-2 by bringing their B-game, how good will they be when their A-game is put on the table? After one week, the rivalry between the Vicious Vixens and the Emo Kidz is heating up once again as they both carry 2-3 records into week two. The Kidz are back (and a lot more of them too) as Bailey "Hickory Dickory" Dockery, Kaila "New York" Metz, & Whitney "Houston" Tenholder used their Buerle muscles to defeat both of the other girls teams. Yet, Whitney "Take a" Bowman recruited some all-star talent including Jamie Overby off of last year's Pink Ladies.
Lastly, the Bearded Unicorns started off the season in the win category when they beat a team from Wright City. Technically, two of their players are from last year's Pink Ladies, which means that they finally get a taste of victory, congratulations.
A LOOK AHEAD: Next week's games are the first installment of divisional match-ups. Though likely nothing will be decided and all six division will remain in a quagmire, there exists the possibility of some teams moving up or dropping way down. There are some intriguing battles... The NL East will see a fight between two undefeated and ranked teams, the 636 Boys and the Zumwalt Bad Boys. These teams represent two separate high schools and there still might be some anguish over a controversial football game last September between Timberland and FZN. The NL Central is a mess, and more than likely, will remain a mess after all the teams do battle. The two who were favored (Arson & Captain Planets) are 3rd and 4th while the 3rd and 4th teams are in 1st (Stingrays and Mean Machines). The NL West looks close, and that's because it is. All 5 teams are playoff caliber, but more than likely only three will make it. Vegas has the odds in favor of the Dream Team and This is Sparta as two of the three.
For the Co-Ed divisions, it looks like the Crazy Ivans may have a lock on the AL West, even this early in the season. Another 5-0 week will make a big gap that the Saints will be unlikely to make up. The AL East is a mix division of Middle School and Girls; therefore, nobody has any idea how that will play out. It is fascinating to find last year's girl champions 3 games out of first place after the first week, some ground will have to be made up. Finally, the AL Central is pretty much tied up with a charged emotional edge going to The Cuts. Then again, Dodge This! has many members from last year's Dodging Divas who finished second in Co-Ed, so it could get interesting. Don't count out the Jackalopes either, they have some players who missed, is Dan "the Man" Zerr going to play? That would change things.
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